I love this post so much. But also as someone who has built tools that thousands of coaches have used, I think anyone who is considering hiring a coach should know that the vast majority of coaches are not using the shady marketing tactics in here.
Your average successful coach is great at coaching and terrible at marketing. Most get their customers through referrals (sort of like how you never see therapists drumming up business while shirtless on Instagram).
So maybe consider "great marketing" to be an counter indicator for the quality of coaching. I don't think that's universal. But if you see a coach who has been in business for a few years, has testimonials and has terrible marketing then there's only one way they got there: by being a good enough coach that they got referrals from their past clients.